I was watching a movie recently – I think it was on the “UP” channel (Fios 738 in these parts) – in which a character repeated several times, “Remember your why.” (Unfortunately, a google did not reveal the movie title.) But it’s a message that finally got through to me this morning.
Remember those days in the past [or early days of your faith]
when you first learned the truth [were enlightened]. You remained strong [endured; persevered] through a hard struggle with many sufferings.
Hebrews 10:32 EXB
I’ve written previously about how the end of the year holidays had disrupted my routine and knocked me out of a productive cycle. Last month (January) I felt like I was slogging through, unclear about what I had set out to do. (Or I should say, what I had been set to doing by my Lord and Savior.) Today I’m feeling rejuvenated about Sharing God’s Story in my one, little life.
When I kept things to myself [silent],
I felt weak deep inside me [my bones wasted away].
I moaned all day long.
Psalm 32:3 EXB
Here it is: I sinned in the past, grievously. (Sin is sin; it is not relative.) I tried to hide it; to cover it up. This only left me miserable and crying out. My guilt and self-condemnation got so bad that I was driven to end my suffering. That was when Jesus himself intervened and literally took my place, saving me. He brought me to a week committed at the Highlands Ranch Behavioral Health Center, where I spent all my time marveling at the miracle I had been privileged to experience. Have you ever had that feeling where you have finally realized that something you thought unbelievable is instead totally true?
Then I confessed [made known; disclosed] my sins to you
and didn’t hide [cover up] my guilt.
I said, “I will confess my sins [transgressions] to the Lord,
and you forgave my guilt [the guilt of my sin].
Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust.
Happy are those who are pure in heart. Matthew 5:8
(Celebrate Recovery Principle 4)
We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. James 5:16 (Twelve Steps, Step 5)
Here it is: the what that happened was not the miracle. A simple kitchen timer going off is a commonplace thing. It is the when that it happened – exactly at the only perfect moment in time – that is miraculous. I don’t believe in coincidences, because there is something very, very intentional about these events happening when they do. It is God’s timing that we witness, upon which we are instructed to wait.
Happy [blessed] is the person whose sins [transgressions] are forgiven, whose wrongs [sins] are pardoned [covered].
Happy [blessed] is the person whom the Lord does not consider guilty [imputes no guilt to].
Psalm 32: 1-2 EXB
Here it is: the evidence of my life since that day (and, in hindsight, many moments prior to that day), is proof of God’s blessing in my life, and his forgiveness. Many times my life should have been over and myself condemned, yet I remain alive, now with a salvation purpose. And I intend to see to it, staying in thankfulness to God all the while. Nothing else is as important as sharing this testimony with the people I love, and practicing the presence of God every day.
You are my hiding place
You protect me from my troubles [distress]
And fill [surround] me with songs [loud cries] of salvation [rescue; deliverance].
Yes, the Lord is my refuge – in plain sight – and He protects me from my troubles – with the peace and acceptance that faith brings. He fills me with song, which is why I will keep on (literally) singing His praises.
My name is Marshall. I blog, give testimony, and play worship music in order to Share God’s Story.